Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Signs You Have Small Kids

I found this great post on Diary of a Modern Matriarch. What's hilarious is that I think I would say about every one of them can be applied to me :)

Signs You're A Mother To Young Children

1) Anytime you hear a thump, you instinctively wait for crying or say aloud, "You're fine. Shake it off." This is especially amusing at the office.

2) You've announced at a staff meeting that you need to go potty.

3) You've found fruit snacks in your bra.

4) Anytime anyone around you asks "Hey, you wouldn't happen to have...?, there's a 99% chance that you do.

5) Your purse would never make it through customs.

6) You can produce a band-aid in 0.3 seconds. However, it may take upwards of 2 seconds to locate a Barbie band-aid.

7) You've gotten dressed, out of the house, and all the way to your destination before you spot that crusted booger on your pant leg.

8) You've discovered baby wipes are some bionic super weapon and can get stains out of almost anything. And boogers.

9) You have at least 4 diapers in your car. Chances are two of them are used and rolled in that tight little ball only parents know how to make so well.

10) There's a sippy cup in the same car that once had apple juice and now contains alcohol.

11) You now know how to make yogurt: Step 1) Give baby bottle. Step 2) Baby throws bottle behind couch. Step 3) Wait three weeks. Step 4) Locate Smell. Step 5) YOGURT!

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